It’s Been a While
Posted by Dr. Cason on Thursday, November 6th, 2008
Hawaii hotel shots. That was a while ago when I stole a few moments pre toddler awakening to grab some sleepy feet shots. Then we nearly drowned in the uncertainty.
I’m become accustomed to the uncertainty. It’s that scratchy sock around my neck that I tugged at in the beginning but now it’s familiar not warm, I mean lets not go crazy here, but I’m used to it. I no longer cry every day. Yes it was that bad. I was stuck in quite a depression and could only write, sob and waste time on the internet.
I’ve now re entered my normal life and quite literally have been cleaning and decluttering like a mad woman. Just before I sat down, I sponged the walls. I can’t believe that I let everything go for so long – not working out, not cooking, not even grocery shopping.
The depression has lifted but I’m not fooling myself. I haven’t just developed this amazing ability to cope. Just that he’s feeling better and acting like a 2 year old.Which means on average he tantrums every 15mintues.
Life has turned into obsessing over how to be a more patient Mommy and not how to solve my son’s pediatric diagnostic dilemma.
Filed in My Life | 9 responses so far
Amy Wrighton 06 Nov 2008 at 1:42 am 1I’m so sorry that you have had to go through that. I kind of wonder if I would have had kids had I known how much worry and love would be poured into them. Nothing can prepare you. I know that I still would have had kids…I just probably would have been terrified!!
Nikkion 06 Nov 2008 at 2:28 am 2Is it weird that I love cleaning and that I have a detail cleaning schedule for my house? It’s weird isn’t it. I’m pretty sure it comes from my restaurant years. Monday’s I vacuum mop the hardwood, and clean all baseboards. Tuesday’s I clean all bathrooms, vacuum the carpet and clean the fridge. Wednesday’s is walls, shine all stainless steel and do the hardwood again… I’ll stop now because suddenly my nerdiness is embarrassing!
When I’m depressed my cleaning goes into overtime… I’m moving appliances and cleaning behind them you know weird stuff like that.
I’m glad your little man is being given a break from the sick and being able to throw his tantrums at will
tiffon 06 Nov 2008 at 5:54 am 3I’m glad to hear that it’s the normal toddler worries you are teasing out at the moment. My linen cupboard always gets a going through when things get on top of me and yet the normal everyday cleaning is passed over for ice cream and internet wallowing.
tiffs last blog post..Booger and Steve.
Carrieon 06 Nov 2008 at 2:28 pm 4Decluttering always helps me clear my mind, like a physical manifestation of getting rid of unnecessary mental baggage or something like that!
I’m glad things are looking up!
Carries last blog post..Sixty Months
Kylaon 07 Nov 2008 at 1:31 am 5I totally understand this. Uncertainty is hard to swallow, but so much more so when it is your child’s health and future that is uncertain.
I’m glad you are on the mend emotionally, and that is one darling little foot.
Kylas last blog post..The new belly.
Kathleenon 07 Nov 2008 at 1:50 am 6Sheila – I think I can so understand what you have gone through, and I’m sure will continue to go through at times. I’m feeling the same way today myself. Sometimes the worries and hurt of life can just be too much — but I have to believe God never gives me more than I can handle, and the same goes with you. He is always there to help us through whatever it may be. Being hurt and worried by the very people we love the most is the worse!
Praise God Jakey is doing so much better. May he continue to get stronger and “throw more tantrums like every little boy should!”
Kathleens last blog post..Life Can Be Very Hurtful . . .
Kathleenon 07 Nov 2008 at 3:48 am 7To all who enjoy Sheila’s blog:
Please click on “the 2008 weblog awards” link in the sidebar and join me in voting Dr. Cason’s blog as “Best Photo Blog.” Here is the nomination. All you have to do is click on the “+” sign to add your nomination to mine.
“I would like to nominate the following blog for Best Photo Blog. Dr. Cason’s photography is incredible. Her sharing of beautiful photography, her life as a pediatrician, and her family brings so much pleasure to all who visit her blog each day.
Dr. Cason.org A Doctor’s Life
http://drcason.org”
Kathleens last blog post..Life Can Be Very Hurtful . . .
Amy Wrighton 07 Nov 2008 at 3:34 pm 8Yay! I voted…
Kathleenon 08 Nov 2008 at 1:47 am 9Thanks Amy for voting too.
I think I understand why my house never gets that good cleaning it used to get. Number one, I was a “perfectionist” before when my children were small and overdid it. Drove my sons crazy! Whenever their friends would come over, no matter how clean it was already I would go into a “cleaning frenzy.” I had the reputation at school as having the cleanest house! Then I came up with rheumatoid arthritis and osteoarthritis and could no longer do this hard work — told everyone God made me slow down and smell my roses — my sweet two sons.
Now that the kids are gone, I don’t the worries as much to “get me going” from the stress. Need to “get going again soon though.” I’m pretty good about keeping things in their place and no cluttering (when I don’t need something, I sell it on the electronic bulletin board at work), but I need to go after those “baseboards and cob webs” for sure. I like Nikki’s daily schedule cleaning plan — that might work good for me. I get so many great ideas from all of you.
Kathleens last blog post..Jesse, You’re So Funny . . .